Saving Grace Read online

  “That’s it. I refuse to have any more children with you.” Sully huffed, trying to disentangle Alex’s arms from his waist.

  Alex tightened her grip. “Matt”—she looked up into his blue eyes—“Lou is a very lucky lady.”

  Grinning, Sully planted a kiss on her forehead. “Aww you know luck has nothing to do with it. I’m serious, though, Erin doesn’t need all that business getting plowed over again. Whatever happened, happened, and whatever Charlotte’s doing now ain’t gonna change the past for Erin.”

  “You’re protective of Erin all of a sudden.”

  “I was at Auburn with her remember. I saw what got left behind. It’s best to leave those ghosts in the past—”

  He was interrupted as Lou flung the kitchen door open. “Are you two gonna hide in here all day, or is it possible that you could get your ass out here to help?”

  Alex threw a look towards Sully. “You sure you wanna ask that question?” she whispered as she followed dutifully behind Lou.

  ***

  It had taken a while, but Erin was feeling human again. The hearty breakfast from Alex helped take the worst off her hangover, and a hot shower and bucketful of coffee had taken care of the rest. Now she sat contemplating what they’d discussed. She laughed as she recalled the reason why Teddy had been so standoffish with her for decades. It made her consider how many things she’d potentially missed out on because of holding onto the past. It was time to let go, she knew that, but however much her head knew what she had to do, her heart was still reluctantly and stubbornly holding on.

  She’d been fourteen when an awareness of being different from other girls at school had awakened. She was sixteen before she knew for sure what that was. She let her head fall back against the back of the sofa as she remembered the conversation with Charlotte. It was the summer of 1990 and Martina Navratilova had just won her ninth Wimbledon singles title. Erin often wondered whether the conversation would ever have happened if Zina Garrison had won the title instead.

  “I didn’t want her to win.” Charlotte stared up at the patches of blue sky visible through the tree canopy, while plucking at the grass stalk in her hand.

  Erin rolled onto her stomach to look at her friend better. “Why not?” She reached out and absently stroked the head of Daisy laying behind her. The large brown dog quickly rolled onto its side hoping there might be the opportunity for a belly rub.

  Charlotte shrugged, then tossed the stalk away, and sat up resting her chin on her knees. “They call me Martina at school,” she mumbled, deliberately not turning to look at Erin. “And her winning is just going to make it worse when I go back.”

  “Well that’s just ’cause you’re a great tennis player and one day you’re gonna win Wimbledon like her.” Erin nudged against Charlotte with her shoulder.

  “S’pose,” Charlotte replied without conviction in her voice.

  Scrambling onto her knees, Erin dusted off her T-shirt. “How come they picked her and not Steffi Graf?”

  Charlotte bit her lip and wiped at a stray tear. “’Cause Steffi Graf isn’t a lesbian.”

  Erin screwed her face up. “Well what the hell has that got to do with anything?” A lump formed in her throat as she thought about her own situation. She was suddenly aware of the fragility of the most significant relationship in her life. If Charlotte was horrified by the prospect of being associated with a famous lesbian, how would she cope knowing about her best friend?

  “Everything!” Charlotte stood up. “You don’t understand.” She gave Erin a sad smile before striding off.

  Springing to her feet, Erin sped after her friend. “So help me understand. Why has someone winning a tournament on the other side of the world got you so bent out of shape?”

  “They’ve picked on me from day one. First, it was my accent, so I lost that. Then it was how I looked”—Charlotte brushed the heel of her hand angrily across her eye furiously— “and then they started calling me Martina. I thought at first it was the tennis, and I was proud. I mean she’s an awesome player, and yes I would have preferred Steffi Graf but still she’s won everything. Then I hear a couple of the girls saying how they’d have to watch each other’s backs in the changing rooms; what with me being a dyke with a girlfriend back home.”

  Erin sucked in a breath. “They think I’m your girlfriend?” Despite the situation, she couldn’t help the butterflies that gathered in her stomach as she considered the possibility.

  Charlotte nodded sadly and sniffed. “They’d been reading your letters and I didn’t know.”

  A deep blush covered Erin’s face. “But there’s nothing in my letters.”

  “I know that and you know that.” Charlotte puffed air out of the side of her mouth, causing her bangs to lift. “Erin, can you keep a secret?”

  Nodding Erin crossed her forefinger across her chest. “Hope to die.”

  “What if I am what they say I am?” Charlotte’s green eyes were wide open, her forehead wrinkled as she waited for Erin’s response.

  Erin pulled her top lip into her mouth and nibbled on it while she considered her reply. A small smile started to form as she stepped closer to Charlotte. She reached down to take Charlotte’s hands in her own. Leaning forward she placed a gentle kiss on Charlotte’s lips. There was a moment when Charlotte kissed her back, but then suddenly her lips were gone. When Erin opened her eyes she saw Charlotte staring at her in shock. Erin’s heart was beating so fast in her chest she was almost light headed. Before Charlotte could say a thing Erin apologized and took off running with Daisy bounding to keep up with her. Leaving a bewildered Charlotte behind.

  Erin groaned as the knocking on her door persisted, bringing her out of her reverie. She stood up and opened the door, recoiling in surprise at Teddy standing on her doorstep.

  “You okay?” She poked her head out to see whether Teddy was alone.

  Teddy nodded. “Can I come in?”

  Moving out of the way, Erin swept her hand across to welcome Teddy into her home.

  Teddy sat down on the edge of the sofa. “I wanted to make sure you were okay. From what I can remember, and my memory is patchy at best, we went over some stuff that could have upset you.”

  Erin sat down and considered what she’d just been thinking about. “You realize we’ve missed out on over twenty years of friendship because of something stupid when we were fourteen?”

  “Totally.” Teddy shrugged. “I’m an idiot. There’s no reason why we can’t make the next twenty count though, right?” She held out her hand.

  Shaking it, Erin smiled. “No reason at all. Though it did get me thinking about what else I’m missing out on. So I have decided to stop being pitiful—”

  “You’re not pitiful,” Teddy interrupted. “I will not have you speak about my friend like that.”

  “Okay not pitiful, but I’m not going to mope around and let life bypass me.”

  Sitting back and getting comfortable, Teddy clapped her hands. “Okay then, so what are we doing?”

  “I’m going to put myself out there and meet people,” Erin said with an emphatic nod. “Women. I’m going to meet women. There’s a bar in Mobile that does a ladies night once a month. I’m going to go.”

  Teddy sucked air through her teeth. “That’s damn near three hundred miles away!”

  Erin shrugged. “I’ve been to others but the one in Mobile was the best.”

  “Awww hell no.” Teddy stood up. “You are not gonna drive three hundred miles to a bar. Jeez girl, a round trip of six hundred miles just on the off chance some woman is willing to show you her tatas?”

  “What option do I have?”

  “If you’re that desperate, I’ll let you have at it on mine. Just don’t expect me to touch anything back.”

  “You are such a great friend. I have no idea how I coped without you until now,” Erin deadpanned.

  Teddy’s face was a picture of sincerity when she slapped Erin’s forearm. “I know! I really am the best friend.” Her
seriousness lasted a full second before she broke into a wide grin. “C’mon we’re going to Sully’s. I have a plan that doesn’t consist of you getting friendly with my bits.”

  Pulling her shoes on, Erin glanced up at Teddy. “You do realize I’m not attracted to you don’t you?”

  Teddy frowned. “Now why would you say that? Alex has been banging that same drum for years, and yet we all know I’m like lesbian catnip.”

  Erin chuckled as she followed Teddy out the door, wondering what was in store for her when they got to Sully’s.

  ***

  “Matthew Sullivan.” Teddy slapped her hand against the wooden bar top as she slipped onto a stool.

  “Claudia Roosevelt.” Sully mimicked Teddy’s actions and slapping the bar.

  Teddy pulled Erin in closer to the bar. “You are familiar with my friend here, Erin Hunter.”

  Sully frowned. “So we’re staying with this weird ass formal thing?” Taking Teddy’s closed eyes as an affirmative, he cleared his throat. “I do, and I would like the record to show that I have been friends with said Erin Hunter since I was a child and didn’t take a twenty-odd-year time-out, before crazy stalking her and doing some strange BFF thing.”

  Teddy nodded solemnly. “So noted.”

  Sully jerked his head in surprise at Teddy’s calm acceptance of his jibe. “What do you want, Teddy?”

  “It has come to my attention that for my friend”—she stressed the word friend while glaring at Sully daring him to comment— “who is a lesbian, to meet women of similar inclinations, she will have to travel a godly distance.”

  Teddy sat forward, leaning her elbows on the bar conspiratorially. “Now it seems to me that we could save our mutual friend from this predicament. As to meet similarly inclined women she would go to a drinking establishment and it just so happens that you own said type of establishment.”

  Sully looked towards Erin. “You want me to host a lesbian night?”

  Erin nodded hesitatingly.

  “Okay.” Sully shrugged as he stepped away from the bar to grab two sodas from the fridge.

  “So I think it only fair that we host an event here at Sully’s,” Teddy concluded, carrying on with her list of reasons why Sully should do it. Ignoring the fact no one appeared to be listening to her and he’d already agreed.

  Placing the two sodas in front of his friends Sully narrowed his eyes as he addressed Erin. “Did she hear me offer?”

  Erin grinned as she picked up her soda. “Probably, but she has a whole speech prepared. I heard it on the way over here. Be grateful I talked her out of the PowerPoint.”

  “Do I need to be here for it, or can I go serve other customers, and pretend that I’m listening?”

  “You’re good. Thanks Sully.”

  He gave her a wink. “No worries. We can do it once all the birthday stuff has calmed down. I’ll put something in the papers here and in St Anton. If you know of any specific places I should advertise let me know and I’ll get on it.”

  “So you see, Sully, as someone with a minor in business studies, you should be able to recognize the benefit of breaking into a diverse market.” Teddy took a self-satisfied slug of her soda.

  “You persuaded me, Teddy. I’m in,” Sully said sardonically, before heading down the bar to other customers.

  Teddy turned to Erin and nodded pleased with herself. “See, told you I could persuade him.”

  Erin rolled her eyes. “You had him at lesbian!”

  ***

  “Go get it, Cooper.” Erin tossed a stick then laughed as Cooper gave her his ‘if you want the damn stick why throw it away’ look before trotting off in the opposite direction. “Or don’t, it’s all good,” she muttered, before taking in a deep breath.

  It was going to be a good day.

  She didn’t know why, but having Teddy force her forwards rather than dwelling on the past, and Sully agreeing to host a lesbian night had her hopeful. They’d advertised the night and were now just waiting to see whether anyone turned up. She was still pondering her good fortune when she heard a loud splash and a string of colorful curses follow it.

  “Goddammit, Cooper get out of the water,” Sully yelled. “Erin, I know you’re here somewhere. Come get this mutt of yours out of the creek before he scares all the damn fish away.”

  Rolling her eyes, Erin changed direction towards Sully’s voice. “You yelling won’t help none,” she said, stepping through the brush to the water’s edge.

  Sully flashed a grin. “Don’t suppose it will. Good thing I’m not set on catching anything today.” He placed his rod onto a rock, sat down and held out a can of soda to Erin.

  She settled down beside him and popped the can open. “You hiding?”

  “Yup, I proposed to Lou last night.”

  “No! Really?” Erin held the back of her hand up to Sully’s forehead. “You feeling alright, old man? Do we need to go get Maddie?”

  Sully slapped her hand away. “You’re a funny lady, you know that.”

  “Congratulations, Lou is a very lucky woman.”

  “I’m the lucky one.” Sully sighed contentedly. “Anyways Ruth showed up on the doorstep at five a.m. with wedding planning stuff, so I hightailed it out of there.”

  Laughing, she held her soda can up in toast. “Your secret’s safe with me.”

  Sully lay back stretching out his long legs and squinting up towards the sun. “So what’s happening in the life of Erin these days?”

  Erin shrugged. “You probably know more than I do.”

  “No secrets in Grace Falls.” Sully nudged her with his leg. “So what’s the deal with Teddy being all up in your business?”

  “It’s funny how being duct taped to one another can bond a relationship.”

  Sully had the good grace to look embarrassed. “About that…”

  “That secret is also safe. I knew Alex didn’t come up with that on her own.” Erin lay back, mirroring Sully’s relaxed pose. “I think she’s trying to save me.”

  “You’re not broken! A little bashed around the edges maybe, but you’re not broken. Don’t let her make you feel that way.” he sat up and looked intently at Erin.

  “I think she sees similarities in our lives, I mean we both struggled to get over our first loves. She’s okay.” Seeing Sully’s raised eyebrows, she reassured him. “Honestly, it’s fine. The minute she does something I’m not comfortable with I’ll tell her. In the meantime, it’s good to have someone who knows about me and Charlotte, and who doesn’t skirt around the topic.”

  Sully reached out and placed a hand on Erin’s thigh. “I’m sorry. I should have done more.”

  Erin patted his hand. “You put me back on the…well, not straight, but definitely the narrow, and that stopped me from getting my ass thrown out of Auburn. You did more than enough. It’s been long enough. I’m ready to move on.”

  “And on the topic of moving on, it looks like we’ll have quite the crowd. I have been getting emails and phone calls already about the lesbian night.”

  “You think Grace Falls is ready for this?” Erin asked, swatting at flies.

  Sully shrugged. “They’re just gonna have to get ready.”

  Erin wanted to share his optimism, but couldn’t help but think they were all being naïve in thinking their small town would accept, she paused wondering what the collective term for a group of lesbians would be, chuckling to herself when she settled on U-Haul.

  “Don’t worry yourself. It’s gonna be just fine,” Sully said with a wink. “I promise. Everything will work out.”

  Chapter Eleven

  Charlotte was so thrilled. She was almost bouncing in her seat as the town car pulled to a stop in the parking lot of the private airfield in New Jersey.

  “Just think. In a matter of six hours we will be in Vegas.” She slapped Molly’s arm in her excitement. “We get to stroll the strip, eat crap, drink loads, and never sleep.”

  She thought her absolute joy of all things Vegas stemmed from
growing up with a mother who was so ‘stick up her ass’ uptight about fun stuff. Charlotte loved it all; the sounds of slot machines in the airport to the funky aromas piped through the air conditioning to disguise the smell of smoke in the casinos. She tried to imagine her mother walking around with a plastic cocktail cup around her neck, and the image made her giggle.

  “I love Vegas,” she announced to a bemused Ellie and Joanne.

  “My grandmother was based there during the war,” Ellie said. “Pretty sure it was a lot different then.”

  Looking around her friend’s faces as they climbed out of the car, Charlotte couldn’t figure out why they weren’t as excited as she was. It was meant to be Ellie and Joanne’s bachelorette weekend. Yet they looked as though they were expecting a wet weekend in Maine as opposed to a four-day vacation in Sin City.

  It had been a somewhat rushed arrangement in the end. As a perk of the job, Joanne had been given use of the private jet she usually flew bigwigs and celebrities in and Molly had taken it upon herself to arrange everything else. All Charlotte had to do was pack and show up at her door when the car arrived.

  The trip was just what she needed. After meeting Maddie, memories from Grace Falls and Erin just kept springing up, often at the most inopportune moments. It was as if, after all this time of protecting herself and blocking the memories out, she had no defenses left. She could be standing in line at a deli and she would hear Erin’s laugh. It was so real she would turn around looking for her, sure she must be standing there. She knew Vegas would invade every sense she had, leaving no room for ghosts from the past.

  As they followed Joanne towards the hangar, Charlotte tried to rouse her friends’ energy levels a little. “You know you all could look happier. We’re going to Vegas!”

  Molly, dragging her carry-on case behind her, stretched and gave a loud impressive yawn. “I’m sorry, I don’t know about the others but I’m just beat. It’s been a long week.” She glared at her sister and her fiancée.

  “Yeah, completely,” Ellie said, watching as Joanne slipped away to complete the paperwork for their flight.

  Their excitement didn’t increase during the flight. Even Charlotte’s best efforts with her lip curling full-blown Elvis impression of Viva Las Vegas did nothing to improve their mood.